Love, Oxytocin & The Full Body Orgasm

Our beloved masseuse Lulu has been practice tantra for over 3 years since 2021, she would like to share some knowledge nad thinks about her tantra experience.

There’s a secret to experiencing deeper intimate connections and mind-blowing full body orgasms. It starts in your brain with a hormone called oxytocin, also known as the “love hormone”. Produced by the pituitary gland, oxytocin is known to stimulate our desire for sex and bonding.
Oxytocin, not only promotes pleasant feelings during and after orgasm, it may also lead to caring and the desire for mutual comfort. Oxytocin is also referred to as the “cuddling chemical”, because it can make both men and women more relaxed and empathetic to the feelings of others. It amplifies our desire for closeness, intimacy and can make us more sexually receptive. It can help regulate sleep patterns by calming the body and mind. A lot of research out there talks about how people who are happily married or in relationships, have a longer lifespan. One of the theories is that being intimate, stimulates the production of oxytocin which alleviates the effects of stress produced by the hormone cortisol. And we all know how detrimental stress can be to our health both physically and mentally.

With that in mind, you may be wondering what you can do to boost levels of oxytocin in your body. Before I get into that, let me start by first explaining what is the effect of oxytocin on sexual desire and orgasm. The first phase of oxytocin’s effect is its power to arouse us sexually. At which point, oxytocin levels reach their peak during orgasm. The problem lies however in the fact that oxytocin breaks down very rapidly in the body after orgasm, which is why the “after sex glow” and the good feelings dissipate rather quickly, especially during casual sex encounters. We may experience a strong desire for sex with someone with “no strings attached”, but it often precipitates an even stronger desire to go home. When there is a deep intimate connection, oxytocin is produced in greater abundance, which might explain why love is really such a powerful aphrodisiac. Studies have shown that there is a direct relationship between the levels of oxytocin in a woman’s body and her ability to experience orgasms. An overload of oxytocin is believed to lead to multiple and full body orgasms.

So how do you get the oxytocin flowing? As I mentioned earlier, oxytocin quickly breaks down after orgasm, so a secret to amplifying levels of oxytocin is…you guessed it! Don’t orgasm. Don’t worry, I don’t mean never have orgasms. I just mean, learn to enjoy building your sexual energy up to its peak and cycle it through the body, as described in the Tantra Heart meditation. Osho says, “when you have come back from a tantric sex act, you have risen, not fallen.” So when we become sexually aroused and move over our peak of excitement, there is a noticeable drop in energy that may make us want to roll over and sleep. When sexual energy is cultivated (without orgasm), as many tantric practices encourage, oxytocin levels continue to rise, filling us with all the wonderful sensations that true love (of self) can ignite. Once released through orgasm, you feel energized and the “after glow” can last for days and even weeks! By raising sexual energy and thus oxytocin, you can experience heightened states of pleasure that lead to full body orgasms, without necessarily depending on someone else to take you there. Oxytocin is under your control!

Touch is really the key to producing more oxytocin in the body. When paired with estrogen, oxytocin can sexually arouse both men and women. In women, the breast area is a particularly sensitive to touch and releases a lot of oxytocin, which is also the same hormone that creates the strong bond between mother and baby. There are certain ways that are more effective than others in massaging the breasts to promote an oxytocin-stimulating effect. Check out tantra massage. This massage can be self-administered, as well as practiced with a partner. Other areas that are oxytocin-sensitive are the lips, earlobes and genitals. In general, any kind of touch helps. According to Dr. Ray Sahelian oxytocin levels have been shown to rise during massage. Women need more oxytocin than men if they are to experience full body orgasms, and thus require more touch, more intimacy, more love. This might explain why Steve P says, ” As a general rule men will ‘fake’ the intimacy for the sex, whereas women will have sex to feel the intimacy.”

by Lulu, Oriental Bliss